Step 2 Self-management — Lifting Your EQ

Knowing the dominant and weak core emotional drives of your temperament is the important first step in lifting your EQ (Emotional intelligence Quotient).  However, the second step of learning to control and moderate your core emotional drives is probably even more important.

In previous blogs I have mentioned that I use the 7MTF/Humm model of temperament of seven drives.  (A good summary can be found here.)

A key part of this model is the change of personality as one becomes more mature and integrated into society — the development of the Normal component. The Normal acts as a stabiliser on the other six components. Those with a strong Normal component are often calm and self composed and appear to have a “flat” personality. Normals love to be part of a group and will use references to other people or precedents as support for an argument. They also prefer the use of logic to emotion and will use the word “logical” in their conversation.

You frequently will see on the web advertisements along the lines of: “Are you good at logic, great at analysis and working out maths problems? Then you’re probably a left-brainer.… Want to get in touch with your intuitive, creative right brain and find a whole other you …?”  In other words, the secret of success is to unleash your creativity.

I take the opposite approach. I think too much of our behaviour is driven by our emotions. The Greeks thought the same. The second great commandment of the Delphic Oracle was “Nothing to excess” or sometimes it is translated as “Everything in moderation.”

Of course, moderation can be taken too far. People with excessive self-control will not allow other people blossom and make decisions for themselves. Also, they fail to learn how to relax. You cannot spend your whole time trying to fix the world. Remember the best you can do is good enough.

However it is the over-emotional people who are typically the problem in the workplace not those who exhibit too much self-control.


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Chris Golis - Author


"Put in a sales perspective, I loved your presentation! I got a lot from what you talked about and I will read your book."

Peter Morris, Executive Officer, Lomax Financial Group

Your presentation on 'Lifting your Level of Emotional Intelligence" to 10 CEOs scored an average 8.9 out of 10 for the topic and 8.5 for the presentation which is great. A couple of the attendees gave you a 10 out of 10, and the comments were:

- Great presentation. Very informative.

- Excellent presentation.

- made me think.

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